It’s Still Our Chair

I don’t think I have made a blog post since before giving birth to Primrose. The story of her birth will come one day, but for now, the time is: Catch Up (always).

I am currently sitting in what used to be “Our Chair”. It is the reclining chair that sits next to the wood stove, facing our wall of windows, looking out to the sunrise over the muskeg and the rest of the 20 acres we call home. Bob and I don’t sit in it together so much any longer. It became quite difficult to share when I grew to full term, and now, it is the chair we share with Primrose. Once we were able to all three comfortably fit (and the cat also joined in) but I’m convinced it was only comfortable because we were all so dang tired we didn’t know what was what. Now each morning Bob takes our little Junebug into the living room around 5 am to sit with her in the chair while I get some much needed sleep laying down.

Exactly 40 weeks pregnant. 12 hours before I arrived at the birth center. I had had a few mild contractions.

A few nights ago as we were falling asleep at 10:30 PM, I could not stop complaining about how bad my back was aching. Each night Primrose sleeps on my chest. We sleep chest to chest, but to have the least amount of reflux and the most amount of comfort for her, I sleep in an almost upright position, propped up by a million and a half pillows. Noticing how this was giving me no sturdy support, Bob leaped out of bed and built a ramp onto the bed for me to sleep on. It has made a world of difference and I’m getting more quality sleep. So much so that I’ve been waking up at 7:30 instead of 9:30 to go for a morning run.

Playing with her imagination and happy as can be!

But this morning I am in the chair with her, doing what Bob and her usually do: Catching up on quiet time bonding, watching the sunrise, while I usually catch up on some ZZzs. We woke up at 4:30 this morning to send Papa off fishing with 907 VETS. We put together chicken salad sandwiches for everyone, and had breakfast together while Primrose was tricked into sleeping on her changing table for 20 minutes (and you can believe she was most definitely strapped in and checked to see if she was breathing every 40 seconds). This morning we prayed for relieving the suffering of others. I will work to help relieve the suffering of Primrose while Bob goes out to help relieve the suffering of individuals in the community. And by doing this work, we will be fulfilled at the end of the day and ready to rest in the presence of each other.

morning bonding time in our chair


Primrose was born just as sweet as pie, with a taste of tart to balance out. She is colicky and at first this was a real strain. Being brand new parents and having that classic feeling “Are you really sure I can just drive on home with this baby?!”, it was very difficult to understand what to do. We worked so hard day and night to relieve her suffering, as any good parents would. We learned what positions are best to hold her in when she is upset, how to fart her multiple ways, I changed my diet radically (no brassicas, dairy, gluten, onion, garlic, or lemon water), what herbs and homeopathies to use, and lots of patience, comfort, love and nurturing. Talking with and receiving support from family, friends, professionals, community members, and through social media was HUGE in relieving our suffering as we couldn’t do it for ourselves or each other…we were so busy giving our all to our newborn. We have finally made it to the catch up phase. It has been almost 2 months and we are finding ourselves able to reach beyond our new little world (PrimLynn). We are able to take care of the other person in small ways that feel gigantic, and just recently, we are able to do things for ourselves, and now for others. It feels wonderful to get to this phase, and Primrose is just adjusting right along, trusting in us and feeling more comfortable being set down on her own. I can go for morning runs, yesterday I did 10 minutes of yoga, and we even went camping. Primrose really loved this and we decided to become campground critics. Since I truly have so much to say but time is getting short as my little one snorts in my lap in our chair I’ll end this catch up blog with my fun review of the campground. Small steps. Baby steps.

It feels good to be getting back into the swing of things. And I’m getting excited about winter bringing the slowness of life, and Bob and I returning to our chair, together.

mamas girl
I changed all her diapers on the neighboring picnic table
ca😜

Ninilchik View Campground: 4/5 Stars

The first thing I noticed was $20 is quite expensive for a tent site campground. We camped in site 8 which was our PERFECT spot as we could see across the river and the old village of Ninilchik to the Russian Orthodox Church and cemetery where we were married last year. Very special and sentimental. However, the campsites are SO CLOSE together. The sites are “grouped” in twos, meaning, 8 and 9 were basically on top of each other, and so were 10 and 11, and so on…This would be wonderful for companion camping (if a family we knew rented 9 for the night), or if you did what the people in 10 did and paid $40 each night so they could have both spots, otherwise you’d be eating at your picnic table while your neighbor watched you while laying down in their tent. The grass was irritatingly long all around the grounds and for site 8 the fire ring was in a strange position. In our opinion to be safe, we had to put our tent on the side of our car back behind the campsite, otherwise the fire would blow right into our tent! The set up isn’t ideal as the flattest spot was in front. For being right off the highway, it was nice and quiet- with even a “no generator” rule during quiet hours. There were RVs but I did not see any mention of plug ins, only dump station fees. The grounds and bathrooms were clean but the bathrooms did not have any toilet paper, just three empty rolls, so take yours to the toilet with you! There is a nice short trail (with a number of stairs!!) that lead right down to the beach-having campsite 10 & 11 have their own trail to the beach. At first I thought, “ooooh! I want that site!”, but I changed my mind after I myself and many others got confused coming up and walked right into those sites. This is first come first serve no reservations campground, so make sure to get there right at noon to swoop up the best spot!

She is not colicky when experiencing the great outdoors!

Published by secretgardenalaska

We love each other, we love our family, we love our planet, we love our sobriety.

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